不幸福的老公都會有哪些抱怨?
Complaints From Unhappy Husbands
不幸福的老公都會有哪些抱怨?
"I Wish She'd Appreciate Me A little More"
"我希望她能更理解我"
The expert says: Whether you work in an office, run a household, or some combination of the two, you're both likely frustrated with your heaping plates of responsibility. And although it's a natural reaction, piling on more the second your partner steps through the door is not the best way to get him to hear or help you. "Instead of leading with a list, understand that he may need a few minutes to unwind," says Kara Thompson, a licensed family and marriage therapist in Lenexa, KS. You'll both listen better when you've decompressed and can actually focus on the issues at hand.
專家認(rèn)為:不管你是上班族還是家庭主婦,亦或是兩者兼有,很有可能你會因自己肩負(fù)的許多責(zé)任而感到沮喪。雖然這是自然反應(yīng),但在另一半剛進(jìn)門后就開始絮絮叨叨并不是讓他們傾聽或幫助你的最好方法。"與其說一長串自己的煩惱,倒不如為他們著想,也許他們也需要幾分鐘放松一下,"肯薩斯州萊內(nèi)克薩的注冊家庭婚姻治療師卡拉·湯普森說道。在壓力有所緩解并能真正專注手頭問題的時候,你們才能更好的傾聽。
"I Wish She'd Plan Date Night Once In A While"
"我希望她能偶爾計劃一次約會之夜"
The expert says: Good news: If you both feel like you need more one-on-one time, you're already on the same page, which means you're well on your way. The next step is to stop keeping a mental score sheet of who made plans the last time and put it on both of you to jump at the opportunity to, say, see a band you like when they perform nearby or try a new restaurant with an innovative menu. In the end, it matters way less who dealt with the logistics than the fact that you bonded and enjoyed your time together.
專家認(rèn)為:這是好消息:如果你們都覺得需要更多單獨相處的時間,那你們已經(jīng)意見一致了,也就是說你們志趣相投。下一步就是不要再在腦海中思考上一次是誰做了計劃,你們兩個都應(yīng)該抓住機(jī)會,比如你最喜歡的樂隊在附近演出時,你們可以一起去看;或者你們可以去嘗試一家菜單標(biāo)新立異的新餐館。最后,關(guān)鍵就在于事實上你們的感情更進(jìn)一步、一起度過的時光也很美好,而不是在于誰進(jìn)行了精心計劃。
"I Miss Having More Lighthearted Conversation"
"我懷念那些談話更為輕松的時光"
The expert says: There's no question that having an open dialogue about your children is important, but we understand that it can get tedious after a while. Once the kids go to bed or while they're out at weekend activities, make an effort to chat about lighthearted topics, like more serious news or political issues to keep you connected and stimulated as a couple.
專家認(rèn)為:開放的談?wù)摵⒆痈鼮橹匾]有問題,但我們也明白一段時間之后這種對話就會變得乏味。當(dāng)孩子們上床睡覺或周末外出參加活動時,你們應(yīng)該多談些輕松的話題,比如更為正經(jīng)的資訊或政治問題,這樣能讓你們更心有靈犀、也更有激情。
"We Aren't Romantic Anymore"
"我們再也不那么浪漫了"
The expert says: Relationships change and evolve, and sometimes the very qualities that attracted you to your husband are the ones that wind up making you nuts. It could be that you're simply too stressed with the day-to-day to experience romance the same way-and that's okay. The key is to come to a collective understanding of what sweet gestures now do it for you. A change of environment may do it-consider taking a break from the grind and going away for a long weekend.
專家認(rèn)為:戀情會發(fā)生變化,也會升華,有時候你吸引你丈夫的那些品質(zhì)正是到最后會讓你感到抓狂的東西。也許日常生活的壓力太大,你們再也無法體會到同樣的浪漫--但沒關(guān)系。關(guān)鍵就是達(dá)成共識:什么樣的甜蜜舉動會讓你感到浪漫。也許換個環(huán)境就行了--可以考慮休假,一起外出度長假。
Complaints From Unhappy Husbands
不幸福的老公都會有哪些抱怨?
"I Wish She'd Appreciate Me A little More"
"我希望她能更理解我"
The expert says: Whether you work in an office, run a household, or some combination of the two, you're both likely frustrated with your heaping plates of responsibility. And although it's a natural reaction, piling on more the second your partner steps through the door is not the best way to get him to hear or help you. "Instead of leading with a list, understand that he may need a few minutes to unwind," says Kara Thompson, a licensed family and marriage therapist in Lenexa, KS. You'll both listen better when you've decompressed and can actually focus on the issues at hand.
專家認(rèn)為:不管你是上班族還是家庭主婦,亦或是兩者兼有,很有可能你會因自己肩負(fù)的許多責(zé)任而感到沮喪。雖然這是自然反應(yīng),但在另一半剛進(jìn)門后就開始絮絮叨叨并不是讓他們傾聽或幫助你的最好方法。"與其說一長串自己的煩惱,倒不如為他們著想,也許他們也需要幾分鐘放松一下,"肯薩斯州萊內(nèi)克薩的注冊家庭婚姻治療師卡拉·湯普森說道。在壓力有所緩解并能真正專注手頭問題的時候,你們才能更好的傾聽。
"I Wish She'd Plan Date Night Once In A While"
"我希望她能偶爾計劃一次約會之夜"
The expert says: Good news: If you both feel like you need more one-on-one time, you're already on the same page, which means you're well on your way. The next step is to stop keeping a mental score sheet of who made plans the last time and put it on both of you to jump at the opportunity to, say, see a band you like when they perform nearby or try a new restaurant with an innovative menu. In the end, it matters way less who dealt with the logistics than the fact that you bonded and enjoyed your time together.
專家認(rèn)為:這是好消息:如果你們都覺得需要更多單獨相處的時間,那你們已經(jīng)意見一致了,也就是說你們志趣相投。下一步就是不要再在腦海中思考上一次是誰做了計劃,你們兩個都應(yīng)該抓住機(jī)會,比如你最喜歡的樂隊在附近演出時,你們可以一起去看;或者你們可以去嘗試一家菜單標(biāo)新立異的新餐館。最后,關(guān)鍵就在于事實上你們的感情更進(jìn)一步、一起度過的時光也很美好,而不是在于誰進(jìn)行了精心計劃。
"I Miss Having More Lighthearted Conversation"
"我懷念那些談話更為輕松的時光"
The expert says: There's no question that having an open dialogue about your children is important, but we understand that it can get tedious after a while. Once the kids go to bed or while they're out at weekend activities, make an effort to chat about lighthearted topics, like more serious news or political issues to keep you connected and stimulated as a couple.
專家認(rèn)為:開放的談?wù)摵⒆痈鼮橹匾]有問題,但我們也明白一段時間之后這種對話就會變得乏味。當(dāng)孩子們上床睡覺或周末外出參加活動時,你們應(yīng)該多談些輕松的話題,比如更為正經(jīng)的資訊或政治問題,這樣能讓你們更心有靈犀、也更有激情。
"We Aren't Romantic Anymore"
"我們再也不那么浪漫了"
The expert says: Relationships change and evolve, and sometimes the very qualities that attracted you to your husband are the ones that wind up making you nuts. It could be that you're simply too stressed with the day-to-day to experience romance the same way-and that's okay. The key is to come to a collective understanding of what sweet gestures now do it for you. A change of environment may do it-consider taking a break from the grind and going away for a long weekend.
專家認(rèn)為:戀情會發(fā)生變化,也會升華,有時候你吸引你丈夫的那些品質(zhì)正是到最后會讓你感到抓狂的東西。也許日常生活的壓力太大,你們再也無法體會到同樣的浪漫--但沒關(guān)系。關(guān)鍵就是達(dá)成共識:什么樣的甜蜜舉動會讓你感到浪漫。也許換個環(huán)境就行了--可以考慮休假,一起外出度長假。